The Qualities of Grace

Dear Adi;
“How can I shift from merely having my basic needs met, financially, to enjoying more of what life has to offer – a home of my own – travel, etc.”  
 … Wanting More

Dear Wanting More – Aug/11

In this life
from the time you were very small
a frame of reference was set
a starting place
from which you viewed yourself and the world
This is, of course
true for all of us
and it is how we play the game
This paradigm was created
like a collage
made from bits and pieces
some from your parents
some from your ancestral memories
some from your culture
and some from your own soul’s readiness
and sense of identity in this life
as well as in all you brought with you
at the time of your birth

This became You
this became what you saw as You
and as you formed this Self
you grew comfortable with her
including her fears
and her sense of limitation in the world
And in this grand design
you had priorities
characteristics chosen
like colours in a work of stained glass
through which your light would shine
and those features you recognized as your gifts
you might treasure and celebrate
and those you saw as your weaknesses
you might suppress or deny
Within all of this
floats a true Self
an eternal Self
a perfect Self
and of course it is the work of each life
to allow her to step ever forward
to find more and more ways
to allow her power to arise

Many lifetimes ago you discovered something within
that we would describe as
a sense of Grace
You claimed this aspect of yourself
with great pride and knowing
and you have let this Grace express
you have coaxed and nurtured it
with comfort and success
And so now
to anyone who meets you
anyone who has known you long
all would agree that you bear this quality
in your presence
for it is an aspect of Self
that you were ready to own

At the same time
in your humanity
you perceived this part of yourself
as needing to present in a certain way
you saw Grace as wearing a particular kind of clothing
as radiating a particular colour of light
as speaking in a particular voice
and busying herself
with particular duties and ways
This is your definition of this part of the Self
and one part of this definition is true to the eternal Self
and one part of it is not
For these are the workings of our human hearts –
we align our fears
hand in hand with our gifts
so that in order for the truth to emerge
we must first pay notice
to that which clouds it
that which may stand in its way

In your fear of being too grand
too powerful
too big in every way
you determined that modesty
caution and patience
were key qualities of one
who would walk with Grace
That reserve
was as important as passion
that a certain invisibility and moderation
was becoming
and that by erring on the side of self-deprecation
you might circumvent any potential judgement
or criticism
aimed at the impulse toward majesty
and strength

And so you nourished these hesitations
as if they were the gift itself
so closely have you come to associate them
with your safety
and your worth
These kinds of patterns are so ingrained
that they cloud the vision thoroughly
and no matter how hard you try to see past them
into the land of opulent love
your sight is clouded
and you simply do not recognize
both how far you are from this larger allowing
and just what the hugeness of it all
truly looks like
even when it is right there
before your nose

And so our counsel
is to make a conscious choice
to break down old assumptions
to unlearn old habits
and deconstruct your world view
as it pertains to your larger Self
for it is only as you dare to step into
the discomfort of knowing yourself anew
that you may begin to taste
all the possibilities
of an empowered, Graceful you

Observe in yourself
subtle judgements of “excess”
and also your essential comfort with lack
Observe in others
what kind of power makes you squirm
makes you feel overwhelmed
and consider that this may in fact
live within you too
Observe, describe and define
with brutal honesty
how you see yourself now
and then paint a picture
with words, colour, voice
however you choose
that may represent the liberation
of the largest aspects of
an active Grace

Notice your heroes and heroines
and how you choose them
and consider adding some new ones
that might have shocked you in the past
Push yourself in awareness
past your comfort zone
by frequenting events and places
that you may have felt
lacked grace of any kind
and watch your own response
to those who live in abundance so easily
Can you re-frame your Self
habit by habit
to include a new definition
one that may not have had any precedent
for we are in a new time
and the old ways of viewing plenty and lack
no longer serve

This is of course
not about material wealth for its own sake
it is about a liberation of the Self
that has lain hidden
by conventions that now must end
As with all creation
there is no limitation
It is all and always
up to you

This came with an image of a “muted” self being introduced to environments, people and tasks that were very vibrant, large, and over the top, in an exercise of learning to stretch your habits of containment and self control. If it is comfortable to you now, then it probably doesn’t count for this exercise. You are asked to willingly break down your boundaries of comfort and caution to transmute energies of self-denial, as specifically as you would enlarge a font on the computer. It’s going to feel threatening and strange, but each step of the way you will be able to look back and gain a new perspective of just how you have hidden your light. In turn, the world will respond by matching and giving to your new, abundant Self.

love, Adi
© Cynthia Long






Dear Adi

I try to love my partner, but I’m not sure of his affection for me. Can the guides tell me what he really feels?

– Uncertain

Dear Uncertain,

The guides wish to tell you a story.

Once upon a time 
there was a lovely young woman

who lived in a very small village
It was her most heartfelt desire 
to help others
who were less fortunate than herself
and so every day she took 
her small basket
and walked by the river to the orchard
and there filled her basket with apples
On her way home
she stopped to give the apples
to anyone who asked
anyone who expressed hunger
anyone who crossed her path
She then retired into her simple hut
for the night
and the next day it all began again
Now this young woman
had never stepped beyond
the boundaries of her village
She was a good girl
a quiet girl
an obedient girl
and she knew that she gave freely
from her heart
But one night she had a dream
and in that dream she felt something behind her shoulders
and lo she had grown wings
and they lifted her high up above the village
and carried her across hills and fields
and soon she saw many other villages
and then mountains and lakes
and then great cities
and immense houses of worship
and finally the towering palace
of the Queen and King
So when her wings carried her 
home again
and she lay down on her straw mat 
to rest
she looked at her hut with new eyes
for she had seen the world
and nothing would ever be the same
Now it was not that she had become less loving
less grateful
or less committed to caring for those in need
but because she had seen the scope
of the world around her
she knew she must explore
must reach beyond the small pathways of her tiny village
because otherwise she would never know
how much she could grow
which souls she could help
and just how many apples
could be carried in flight
And so the small hut no longer called her to stay
and the small basket held 
not enough capacity

for all the fruit she wished to taste

and to share
and while the beauty that lay 
before her each day
was no less
she knew it did not serve her or anyone else
to remain without wings when they were there for her
if only she would allow her dreams
For you see
acceptance of the simplicities
and preciousness of every nuance of our lives
is indeed the highest wisdom
but to be deeply true
this awareness must come
from a vision that has been allowed to roam
and only then return
when the choice is very clear
Let us choose our straw mats
for their perfection
but let us experience also a feather bed
so our choice will emerge from genuine humility
and not a poverty of experience
Let us sample every fruit our world ripens 
before us
so we may then decide
if it is apples we wish above all
to share
Our world is as wide and great
as we allow it to be
and yet at all times it lives utterly within our own hearts
We must first fly far
in order to truly see what is Home
and in this way
set free all doubt that may be hiding
in the dust of duty
and guilt
There are no walls on your village Dear One
and your wings await only
for you to awaken
from your sleep…


Dear Readers

We live in evolving times. As our awareness grows, so does our perception of old moralities. Notions of good and bad, blessings and sins, responsible and dutiful behaviours, all these are shifting in the winds of awakening.

Many of us have been taught since infancy that it is better to give than to receive, that if we are “good” we will put the needs of others first, that denial of the Self is an act of righteousness. Desires and pleasures become dangerous, and holiness lives in the willingness to serve.

While natural, free spirited giving may indeed emerge from the wisest of souls, authentic generosity of spirit is never achieved through denial of one’s own needs. It is rather a stage of openness that emerges only when our natural inner hunger has been already been met. We can only radiate and share love when we are secure and content in our own worthiness to receive it. In our spiritual aspirations, or in an effort to find love, many of us attempt to take a short cut to “selflessness” and find ways to bury our wants until we become so far out of touch with our heart’s desires, we don’t really know who we are.

This sweet story guides a loving woman toward the awareness of just how much freedom she denies herself, and offers her permission to rise up and fly on the wings of her desires and dreams. The beauty of the discovery that lies ahead for her is that she will not take away from her ability to love others by taking flight from limitation, but rather find a new power in it, fueled by authenticity and passion. By feeding the genuine needs of the Self, not only do we not limit ourselves, but we grant our hearts an even greater capacity to give…
much love,